Magazine

Photo: CTK Czechs use the phrase “It’s a dogs life” to express the sentiment that life is a struggle and when they wish to say they are feeling under the weather they will tell you that they feel worse than a dog. But in reality most Czech dogs lead a pampered existence and their living conditions get better and better. No longer are their masters feeding them left-overs - instead they get well balanced, vitamin-enriched dog food to keep them in top form. There are now hotels for dogs whose masters are away on holiday and a special dog bakery offering a variety of dog treats – which, incidentally, are far healthier than most of the stuff their masters consume. And most recently there is the coin-operated dog wash franchise – an alternative to the family bathtub or dog salon. The MetroDogs dog wash has arrived in the Czech Republic and promises an all round dog-grooming experience in a friendly environment – for the price of 100 crowns. The shampoo is hypo-allergic, won’t sting their eyes and is effective against ticks and fleas. Certainly Czech dogs have no reason to complain that they are living a dog’s life – and there may soon be more metrodogs in the Czech Republic than there are metrosexuals.

The ministry for local development has a problem. It is looking in vain for gravediggers. Grave-digging as a profession is simply not “in” these days and people are not willing to do it. A law stipulating that grave-diggers need to be qualified is not helping much and individual towns and villages complain that they are unable to meet the requirement that each municipality should employ its own qualified gravedigger. The local development ministry is offering re-qualification courses at the price of 4,000 crowns, at the end of which a potential gravedigger will have to pass an exam – digging a grave within the space of a set time limit and answering questions on hygiene and safety at the workplace. People who fail can take the test again, the ministry says. Not very encouraging clearly, and so far it has not met with a positive response. Meanwhile, the shortage gets more pressing and some gravediggers are now expanding their locations, working in as many as seven graveyards. Maybe the ministry will have to offer some perks and put up a few action-packed billboards advertising the grave-digging profession. Come to think of it, pictures of the grave-diggers scene from Hamlet might give the profession more glitz…

Photo: www.sudoval.cz Anyone who has ever heard the song Roll out the Barrels must instinctively know that it has Czech roots – although the original Czech version is called Škoda lásky or Wasted love. In any case, rolling out the barrels is something Czechs do plenty of and every summer there is a barrel-rolling competition on the outskirts of Brno. Contestants roll a beer barrel over a 50 metre stretch, staying on course and going as fast as possible. Twenty-two-year old Tomáš Durkech is the local beer-rolling champion having won several years in succession and covering the distance in 13 seconds flat. However this year the organizers changed the rules – taking into consideration the age of contestants and giving older people bonus points. So although Tomas reached the finish line first as usual – he ranked fifth – while the beer medals went to contestants in their 80s and 60s. Tomáš is naturally somewhat disappointed, but he says things can only get better with age. As for the senior beer rollers – they thought they’d not live to see the day….

A wasp is being held responsible for an accident that caused 300,000 crowns in damages. The insect flew into the cabin of a car traveling down a main road and proceeded to pester the driver. The man, who was in the car alone, was so unsettled he failed to stop the car safely – flinging his arms out to protect his face and swerving into the opposite lane where he collided with an oncoming vehicle. Luckily, no one was injured in the accident, least of all the wasp which went on its way. The police say it is lucky the man was not traveling along a highway where the wasp could have caused a major pile-up. Even so for a creature that size 300,000 crowns in damages is quite a feat.

Photo: Policie Cheb A forty-seven-year-old man and a forty-year-old woman shocked passers-by in a park near the city centre of Cheb this week by giving in to the urge to have sex here-and-now. The couple simply tore their clothes off and went about it without a thought for the dozens of passers-by and children running around the park. They didn’t even stop when the police arrived and started taking snapshots of them to document the scene. “A number of people rang our hot-line and we had to physically separate them and get them on their feet when we got there,” one of the officers told journalists later. More surprising yet, it appears that the couple only knew each other for about two hours having met at a nearby restaurant. The police say they’d never witnessed a similar incident with people their age, although sixteen year olds could be fairly uninhibited. Whatever the reason for their behavior, one can only hope that the sex was good, because it will most likely be the most expensive sexual encounter they will ever have!